Stephen: Demonstrating God’s grace and power

In a previous post, we considered the appointment of the seven deacons in the early church. These men were appointed to serve tables. Their responsibility was to ensure equitable food distribution in the church. Yet, to qualify this role, the men had to possess some qualities: “Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business.” (Acts 6:3 NKJV). These qualities led to the appointment of Stephen, a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit; also Philip, Procorus, Nicanor, Timon, Parmenas, and Nicolas from Antioch, a convert to Judaism (Acts 6:5). These men were assigned the responsibility of ensuring that food is equally distributed. One of these men had a phenomenal wisdom about the word of God that led to jealousy among the religious leaders.

Now Stephen, a man full of God’s grace and power, performed great wonders and signs among the people. ‭(Acts 6:8)

Acts 6:5 describes Stephen as a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit. Stephen wasn’t your ordinary deacon. He was a man who could stand and deliberate the word of God with the religious leaders. Other than just ensuring equity in food service, Stephen went the extra mile. In Acts 6:8 (NKJV), we are informed that Stephen, full of faith and power, did great wonders and signs among the people. What were the great wonders Stephen did? Stephen might have spoken the word of God with all boldness, healed the sick, restored the weak, encouraged the broken hearted among many other things. These phenomenal things drew the attention of the religious leaders. The wisdom and dexterity of Stephen prompted the religious leaders to argue with Stephen. Some people from the Synagogue of the Freedmen (Cyrenians, Alexandrians, and those from Cilicia and Asia), began arguing with Stephen. However, they were not able to resist the wisdom and the Spirit by which he spoke. Then they secretly induced men to say, “We have heard him speak blasphemous words against Moses and God.” ‭(see Acts 6:9-11 NKJV). ‬

In their jealousy, they stirred up the people and the elders and the teachers of the law. They seized Stephen and brought him before the Sanhedrin. As if this was not enough, they produced false witnesses, who testified, “This fellow never stops speaking against this holy place and against the law. For we have heard him say that this Jesus of Nazareth will destroy this place and change the customs Moses handed down to us.” (‭Acts 6:12-14). The lies told against Stephen were an attempt to drag him down. When Stephen was given the opportunity to defend himself before the Sanhedrin, he appeared with an angelic demeanor. His face was like the face of an angel (‭Acts 6:15).‬ Beginning from Abraham to Jesus, Stephen. The deacon preached a phenomenal message on God’s route to salvation. The people’s response was fatal: When the members of the Sanhedrin heard this, they were furious and gnashed their teeth at him. (Acts 7:54). The people dragged Stephen out of the city and stone him to death. The witnesses (those who stoned Stephen) laid their coats at the feet of a young man named Saul (‭Acts 7:58). Even at the point of death, Stephen was compassionate. He fell on his knees and cried out, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” When he had said this, he fell asleep.‭ (Acts 7:60).

Stephen’s brief ministry was quite impactful. He was committed, dedicated and ready to die for the gospel. He was appointed a food distributor but he is best known as an evangelist, one with an apologetic ministry. He stood for the truth and died for the truth. How many believers can boldly stand for the truth even in the midst of wolves. Maybe we are not not being persecuted with death threats like Stephen and the early apostles but we still find it difficult to let those around us know what we really believe in. May we have the grace to demonstrate God’s grace and power even in the midst of tribulations. So help us God!

He brings counsellors our way

Imagine being the only judge or arbitrator for over a million people. Every case will end up on your table, the big, the small, the important, the insignificant and all manner of cases. Your day will be filled by settling and resolving disputes and you are likely to have a tall list of people on the waitlist. In another scenario, if there are local and community deputies who act as judges over sections of the people, the main judge is likely to deal with only matters worthy for the “Supreme Court”. This scenario can be likened to what Moses faced in his role as the leader of the Israelites. Moses had a visit from his father-in-law and “the next day Moses took his seat to serve as judge for the people, and they stood around him from morning till evening.” (‭‭Exodus‬ ‭18:13‬). Moses’ father-in-law was overwhelmed by the way Moses had to deal with all the issues from the people.

If you do this and God so commands, you will be able to stand the strain, and all these people will go home satisfied.” (‭‭Exodus‬ ‭18:23‬)

According to ‭‭Exodus‬ ‭18:14‬, “When his father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he said, “What is this you are doing for the people? Why do you alone sit as judge, while all these people stand around you from morning till evening?”” All these while, Moses and the elders of Israel had seen nothing wrong with their approach to dealing with the people’s cases. It is like spending quality time doing something that others can achieve more and over with little time invested. Moses was spending the whole day judging cases, there was no time to teach the people, nor fellowship with God. Meanwhile, among the people were leaders who if trained could help in dealing with these cases. But, it took God’s intervention by bringing Jethro, Moses’ in-law who gave the word of wisdom. This was the counsel of Jethro,
“What you are doing is not good. You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone. Listen now to me and I will give you some advice, and may God be with you. You must be the people’s representative before God and bring their disputes to him. Teach them his decrees and instructions, and show them the way they are to live and how they are to behave. But select capable men from all the people—men who fear God, trustworthy men who hate dishonest gain—and appoint them as officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens. Have them serve as judges for the people at all times, but have them bring every difficult case to you; the simple cases they can decide themselves. That will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you. If you do this and God so commands, you will be able to stand the strain, and all these people will go home satisfied.” (‭‭Exodus‬ ‭18:17‭-‬23‬).

This counsel from Jethro was well taken by Moses. He implemented it and the load was shared among all the people. Imagine if Moses had refused this counsel, he wouldn’t have been able to take the whole nation to the edge of the promised land. He would have been so burdened with cases that would have drained both him and the people. Good counsel is important for every believer including church leaders and influential Christians. No matter how much you know about scripture, you should always ask God to bring trustworthy counsellors your way. Proverbs‬ ‭15:22‬ ‭admonishes that “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” Each believer needs someone, a spirit-filled friend, a counsellor who will provide Godly counsel. Rehoboam rejected good counsel and harkened to bad counsellors and the result of their bad counsel led to the break in the kingdom of Israel (2 Chronicles 10).

God always speaks to us through His word, through the Holy Spirit, through the people He brings our way and sometimes through the things we see and experience. Don’t shut your ears to Godly counsel and if you don’t have people who give Godly counsel, pray to God to bring Spirit-filled counsellors your way. Don’t be so wise in your own eyes, let Godly wisdom lead every decision you make.

The mother of King Lemuel

The book of Proverbs presents different dimensions of the personification of women. Wise woman, adulterous woman, nagging woman among many others. In this post, we shall focus on the mother of King Lemuel as mentioned in Proverbs 31:1. First, who is King Lemuel and who was his mother? Different Biblical scholars attribute King Lemuel to King Solomon and few others attribute King Lemuel to King Hezekiah. If King Lemuel was a pseudonym for King Solomon or maybe his mother’s pet name for him, then the mother here would have been Bethsheba. We will not focus so much on who Lemuel and his mother were, but rather spend time to understand the timeless advice shared by the mother of Lemuel. Many women play instrumental roles in the lives of their sons. Depending on such relationships,  some sons tend to be more reliant on their mothers unduly causing strife and enmity between their mothers and wives. Your mother will always be your mother but she can never replace your wife. Thus, understanding the role dynamics of each helps to keep a peaceful relationship between son and mother, daughter-in-law and mother and within the three. 

The sayings of King Lemuel—an inspired utterance his mother taught him. (Proverbs 31:1)

King Lemuel recorded these wise utterances from his mother. Proverbs 31:1 begins as this: “The sayings of King Lemuel—an inspired utterance his mother taught him.” We don’t know at what time in King Lemuel’s life his mother gave this inspired utterance. It could be before he became a king or after he became a king. These words seem to be an important part of Lemuel. His mother begins by calling out to her son: “Listen, my son! Listen, son of my womb! Listen, my son, the answer to my prayers!” (Proverbs 31:2). She advised her son against womanizing: “Do not spend your strength on women, your vigor on those who ruin kings” (Proverbs 31:3). The mother also caution Lemuel on the potency of alcohol to ruin Kings. She said: “It is not for kings, Lemuel— it is not for kings to drink wine, not for rulers to crave beer, lest they drink and forget what has been decreed, and deprive all the oppressed of their rights. Let beer be for those who are perishing, wine for those who are in anguish! Let them drink and forget their poverty and remember their misery no more.” (Proverbs 31:4‭-‬7).

The mother of Lemuel finally advised the son on matters of justice and fairness. She said, “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.” (Proverbs 31:8‭-‬9). It is expected of rulers to be just and fair. Whenever rulers are blinded by bribes, they tend to pervert justice and the poor and needy tend to be at the mercies of the law. The mother of Lemuel understood that kings are not measured by just their wealth but by how they influenced their nations, societies and people. She understood that no King can be excellent in matters of state and leadership if their focus is to spend their strength on different women; drink alcohol and be drunk; and refuse to apply justice and fairness. These words are timeless and still relevant in the 21st century. Any ruler who busy themselves in lifestyles that do not promote good governance, accountability and fairness is at risk of losing their position. 

The mother of King Lemuel does an excellent job by imprinting these words in her son. Some of the lessons we learn from this woman include the following:
Words are powerful: These sayings have survived years and are still relevant. 
Mothers play instrumental roles: The king did not ignore the wisdom in his mother’s words. All mothers and motherly figures in our lives play instrumental roles. However, know when their roles cease so they do not become a distraction in your marriage and home. 
Immorality can debase even a king: Lemuel’s mother advised that the trap of sexual immorality through womanizing can ruin a king. It still does today. Any young man who spends his time changing women, sleeping with different women etc. cannot achieve anything good in life.
Alcohol is a life zapper not a life saver! Since the time of Noah, all the vile use of alcoholic drinks have disgraced men and women of nobility. If you can stay away, avoid making alcohol your companion.
Justice and fairness are timeless: If we fail to apply justice and fairness, we fail to understand the weightier matters of the law. We will be judged by our actions. 

The queen of Sheba

One of the glamorous women in the Bible is the queen of Sheba. Different historical books have documented different versions of her story and given her different names based on their traditions. I will stick to the account in 1 Kings 10. We have seen different women who occupied different roles in the Bible. From slaves, to prostitutes, from wives to mothers, from Judges to warriors among many others, the Bible is not a book that is silent on women. The Bible projects different shades of women and we see the different systems that helped the women succeed, suffer or be shamed. The Christian is reminded that women played an important historical role and they are very important and relevant in our days. The queen of Sheba was obviously an influential woman. She was exceptionally rich and commanded authority. The exact location of Sheba has been a contention for archeologists. While some claim that Sheba is in Africa, others are of the view that Sheba is in Arabia. 

When the queen of Sheba heard about the fame of Solomon and his relationship to the Lord, she came to test Solomon with hard questions. (1 Kings 10:1)

The queen of Sheba would be a rich national figure, a woman of good understanding and dominated an obvious rich monarchy. She lived in the era of king Solomon. God gave king Solomon exceeding wealth and knowledge. He was a global icon and people from all over the world travelled to Jerusalem to experience his wisdom. Therefore “when the queen of Sheba heard about the fame of Solomon and his relationship to the Lord, she came to test Solomon with hard questions” (1 Kings 10:1). She did not travel empty. She arrived at “Jerusalem with a very great caravan—with camels carrying spices, large quantities of gold, and precious stones—she came to Solomon and talked with him about all that she had on her mind” (1 Kings 10:2). All her questions were answered by the king and there was nothing too hard for the king to explain to her (1 Kings 10:3). The queen of Sheba was amazed at the wisdom of Solomon, the orderliness in his palace, the beautiful temple of the Lord and the organisation of the activities in the Palace. She was amazed. She said to the king,
“The report I heard in my own country about your achievements and your wisdom is true. But I did not believe these things until I came and saw with my own eyes. Indeed, not even half was told me; in wisdom and wealth you have far exceeded the report I heard. How happy your people must be! How happy your officials, who continually stand before you and hear your wisdom! Praise be to the Lord your God, who has delighted in you and placed you on the throne of Israel. Because of the Lord’s eternal love for Israel, he has made you king to maintain justice and righteousness.” (1 Kings 10:6‭-‬9)

The rich queen of Sheba presented gifts to king Solomon. “She gave the king 120 talents of gold, large quantities of spices, and precious stones. Never again were so many spices brought in as those the queen of Sheba gave to King Solomon.” (1 Kings 10:10). In turn, king Solomon gave the queen of Sheba all she desired and asked for, besides what he had given her out of his royal bounty. The queen of Sheba left Jerusalem and returned with her retinue to her own country (1 Kings 10:13).

The queen of Sheba travelled to Jerusalem to test Solomon with hard questions and she left satisfied. When men rule in wisdom, kings and queens will seek them. Similarly, when we live our lives in integrity and understand and apply the Kingdom principles of elevation, kings will come to our rising. May we be sought-after because of the grace of God on us. 

Two prostitutes and one living baby

The Bible is made of women who took diverse roles and responsibilities. However, there were also women who had a profession of attracting men and sleeping with them for money. Why would the Holy Book mention accounts of different prostitutes? First, we know that God, since Genesis has been seeking for the sinner including the prostitutes. He calls all humanity to Himself. Further, knowledge that prostitutes, that is a group of people scorned by society could end up in God’s Holy Book, gives the assurance that none is too bad to be saved. Again, we learn lessons from some of the ways these people were transformed from nobodies to history makers (see Rahab). Although some of the women became prostitutes for selfish reasons (Tamar), we still see how God used their low lives to bring His bigger picture. Male and female prostitution is sinful and sexual immorality has no place in Heaven (Revelation 2:15). We shall consider two prostitutes who presented their case for king Solomon. 

Now two prostitutes came to the king and stood before him. (1 Kings 3:16)

In 1 Kings 3:15-28, we see the story of two prostitutes who had a bad quarrel and definitely needed some help. I am not sure if there were any birth control remedies for these prostitutes as their business could lead to pregnancies. These two prostitutes got pregnant and gave birth around the same time (3 days interval) and lived alone in their house (1 Kings 3: 18). One night, one of the women laid on her baby and the baby died. She woke up and took the living baby of the other woman and placed her dead baby in its place. Although the children were almost of the same age, the mother of the living baby realized that her baby had been taken and a dead one had been placed in his stead. In our modern-day, the king would have requested a blood test or even DNA test to know whose child is dead and whose child is alive. But these technologies were not available in the days of Solomon. The two prostitutes continued to quarrel before the king. One says, ‘the living child is mine’ and the other says, ‘the living child is mine’. How do you resolve this issue in 1000 BCE?

King Solomon must have been surprised to see the two women arguing for a living baby and none accepting the ownership of the dead baby. The king said, “This one says, ‘My son is alive and your son is dead,’ while that one says, ‘No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.’ ” (1 Kings 3:23). Through the wisdom of God, the king gave this verdict: “Bring me a sword.” So they brought a sword for the king. He then gave an order: “Cut the living child in two and give half to one and half to the other.” (1 Kings 3:24‭-‬25). This test of compassion quickly yielded results. The woman whose son was alive was deeply moved out of love for her son and said to the king, “Please, my Lord, give her the living baby! Don’t kill him!” But the other said, “Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!” (1 Kings 3:26). The woman who had the living baby would prefer the son alive and with the other woman than to see him die. On the other hand, the one with the dead baby wanted the living one killed as well. She had no compassion for the innocent baby because she was not the mother! 

This was the judgement of the king: “Then the king gave his ruling: “Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother.” (1 Kings 3:27). The wise judgement stunned all Israel. “When all Israel heard the verdict the king had given, they held the king in awe, because they saw that he had wisdom from God to administer justice.” (1 Kings 3:28).

The two prostitutes did not know that their quarrel would end up in the Bible. Thousands of years later, we still read about their story and how the wisdom of God was clearly displayed in the judgement. 

The wise woman from Abel Beth Maakah

The Bible is full of different women whose wise counsel averted an otherwise dangerous situation. Abigail prevented David and his men from destroying Nabal and his household. The wise woman from Tekoa used wisdom to admonish king David to accept Absalom back to Jerusalem. In today’s post  we shall consider another woman whose wisdom prevented an entire city from being destroyed. We shall refer to her as the wise woman from Abel Beth Maakah. As a background to her story, when David was returning to Jerusalem after Absalom’s revolt, a troublemaker named Sheba, son of Bikri, a Benjamite, happened to be there. He sounded the trumpet and shouted, “We have no share in David, no part in Jesse’s son! Every man to his tent, Israel!” (2 Samuel 20:1). This act of Sheba caused all the men of Israel to desert David to follow Sheba son of Bikri. Only the men of Judah stayed by their king all the way from the Jordan to Jerusalem (2 Samuel 20:2). David knew that if Sheba was allowed to roam and go free, he would end up doing more harm than Absalom did. Therefore, David told Abishai, a commander in his army, to pursue Abishai before he escaped (2 Samuel 20:6).

a wise woman called from the city, “Listen! Listen! Tell Joab to come here so I can speak to him.” He went toward her, and she asked, “Are you Joab?” “I am,” he answered. She said, “Listen to what your servant has to say.” “I’m listening,” he said. (2 Samuel 20:16‭-‬17)

The rebellious Sheba, passed through all the tribes of Israel to Abel Beth Maakah and through the entire region of the Bikrites, who gathered together and followed him (2 Samuel 20:14). The rebellion was gaining popularity and something needed to be done quickly. Thus, the army of David besieged the city of Abel Beth Maakah because of Sheba. The army built a siege ramp up to the city, and it stood against the outer fortifications in an attempt to bring the city walls down (2 Samuel 20:15). The whole attack of Abel Beth Maakah was because of one person, Sheba. However, the words of the wise woman averted the doom upon the city. This woman was courageous enough to take a stand. She called from the city, “Listen! Listen! Tell Joab to come here so I can speak to him.” (2 Samuel 20:16). She requested for the presence of the whole army commander, the general of Israel’s army. She was determined to bring peace. When Joab moved to her she asked, “Are you Joab?” And Joab answered, “I am.” She said, “Listen to what your servant has to say.” Joab replied, “I’m listening.” (2 Samuel 20:17).

The wise woman sought the attention of Joab, the man who had the authority to stop the battering of the city walls. Like the daughters of Zelophehad who sought for the hearing of the elders and Moses, this woman spoke with the right person. Speaking with the right person at the right time saves unnecessary delays. The woman presented her case this way: “Long ago they used to say, ‘Get your answer at Abel,’ and that settled it. We are the peaceful and faithful in Israel. You are trying to destroy a city that is a mother in Israel. Why do you want to swallow up the Lord’s inheritance?” (2 Samuel 20:18‭-‬19). Joab replied that the sole purpose for battering the city walls was to arrest the rebellious Sheba, son of Bikri. Joab requested that if they hand over Sheba, the army will withdraw (2 Samuel 20:20-21). The wise woman did not delay, she quickly told Joab, “His head will be thrown to you from the wall.” (2 Samuel 20:21b). 

The wise woman knew that as influential as Sheba was, she would need to convince her people the need to get rid of him. She didn’t just force her opinion on them, “the woman presented her strategy to the whole city and they did it: They cut off the head of Sheba son of Bicri [Bikri] and tossed it down to Joab. He then blew a blast on the ram’s horn trumpet and the soldiers all went home. Joab returned to the king in Jerusalem.” (2 Samuel 20:22 MSG). Knowing what to do at every moment requires wisdom. Imagine if the wise woman had not intervened, an entire city would have been destroyed for one man’s rebellion. 

The wise woman from Abel Beth Maakah teaches important life lessons. First, she demonstrated courage. She also sought the attention of the right person. She was quick to let her strategy be known to her people. She was not clueless about the impact of Sheba’s actions. She knew that attacking the king was liable to death. 

The book of Proverbs admonishes us that, “It takes wisdom to build a house, and understanding to set it on a firm foundation; It takes knowledge to furnish its rooms with fine furniture and beautiful draperies.” (Proverbs 24:3‭-‬4 MSG). Not knowing what to do, makes you liable to pain. 

The wise woman from Tekoa

“A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17:22). The events in the household of king David did not just bring a family feud but enmity and dryness. David’s own son had raped his daughter, the brother of the raped daughter, another son of David, killed the rapist and fled. The atmosphere in David’s palace was not the best at this moment. Sometimes when situations such as these happen, it can literally crush one’s spirit. David’s cycle of misfortunes could be directly connected to his own sins (adultery and murder). After Absalom avenged his brother, he knew that he was liable to death as well. Absalom action was intentional. It took him two years to plan how to execute the vengeance against Amnon. According to the law, “If anyone with malice aforethought shoves another or throws something at them intentionally so that they die or if out of enmity one person hits another with their fist so that the other dies, that person is to be put to death; that person is a murderer. The avenger of blood shall put the murderer to death when they meet” (Numbers 35:20‭-‬21).Thus, Absalom was liable to death. The only way for this to be averted is a decree from the king. The woman for this post is a wise woman who was commissioned for the task of restoring Absalom. 

So Joab sent someone to Tekoa and had a wise woman brought from there. He said to her, “Pretend you are in mourning. Dress in mourning clothes, and don’t use any cosmetic lotions. Act like a woman who has spent many days grieving for the dead. (2 Samuel 14:2)

For three years, Absalom lived in Gerur. He fled from his father. But, David was comforted and longed for his son. To have Absalom back to Jerusalem, a word from the king would spare Absalom from the avenger of blood. David’s army commander,  Joab, took this task upon himself. “Joab son of Zeruiah knew that the king’s heart longed for Absalom. So Joab sent someone to Tekoa and had a wise woman brought from there. He said to her, “Pretend you are in mourning. Dress in mourning clothes, and don’t use any cosmetic lotions. Act like a woman who has spent many days grieving for the dead. Then go to the king and speak these words to him.” And Joab put the words in her mouth.” (2 Samuel 14:1‭-‬3). Of all the women in Jerusalem, Joab knew that for this task, a special woman is needed. Not any ordinary woman but one with a proven record of wisdom. Someone who could boldly stand in front of the king of Israel and request him to send for his son who had fled for committing murder. Joab knew that the wise woman from Tekoa was right for the task. Joab told the woman what to say to the king. 

King David was merciful to the woman and her plea for mercy for her son was accepted (2 Samuel 14:5-7). After setting the background for mercy, the woman then brought up the story of David’s own son Absalom. She said, “Why then have you devised a thing like this against the people of God? When the king says this, does he not convict himself, for the king has not brought back his banished son? Like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be recovered, so we must die. But that is not what God desires; rather, he devises ways so that a banished person does not remain banished from him.” (2 Samuel 14:13‭-‬14). David knew that this woman did not just walk to the palace with such a story. He knew someone would have tasked her to do what she did. The woman revealed that Joab tasked her to plead on behalf of Absalom. She told David, “Your servant Joab did this to change the present situation. My Lord has wisdom like that of an angel of God—he knows everything that happens in the land.” (2 Samuel 14:20).

The action of the woman did not just restore Absalom, it also healed David’s crushed spirit. 2 Samuel 13:39a indicates that David longed to go to Absalom. King David was consoled concerning the death of Amnon and yet, he allowed Absalom to live in exile until the woman from Tekoa came to him. The action of this woman restored the family of David. Absalom was forgiven and one more time peace was restored in David’s palace. Although the peace did not stay for long, momentary, David’s crushed spirit was revived and Absalom was given a second chance at life.

Not many people have a second chance at life. The wise woman’s plea gave Absalom another opportunity to make things right. 

Abigail: Patience is a virtue

Marriage is a full package and depending on your spouse, you might get more than you wanted or nothing close to what you really wanted. Abigail was married to probably one of the richest men in her community. Nabal had property at Carmel, and was very wealthy. He had a thousand goats and three thousand sheep (1 Samuel 25:2). I am sure Abigail did not need to worry about food and other things needed for daily living. In fact, she was able to organize a party for an army of over 600 people in just a short time without asking for help from her husband: “She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys” (1 Samuel 25:18). Even in the 21st century, it would cost a fortune to prepare this meal fit for a king. In other words, money and food wouldn’t have been a worry for Abigail. Her worry was the fact that she was a beautiful and intelligent woman who was married to a foolish and brutish man. Such an irony!

When Abigail went to Nabal, he was in the house holding a banquet like that of a king. He was in high spirits and very drunk. So she told him nothing at all until daybreak. About ten days later, the Lord struck Nabal and he died. (1 Samuel 25:36‭, ‬38)

Abigail acted wisely to save herself, Nabal and the whole family from David’s attack. David confirmed that if Abigail had not intervened, not one male belonging to Nabal would have been left alive by daybreak (1 Samuel 25:34. Meanwhile, the chief culprit, Nabal, was partying. He had no clue what he had caused and how his wickedness had almost escalated to a potential death threat. The matter was settled and David and his men returned to their hideout. Abigail might have shared a sigh of relief. “When Abigail went to Nabal, he was in the house holding a banquet like that of a king. He was in high spirits and very drunk. So she told him nothing at all until daybreak” (1 Samuel 25:36). Nabal’s folly had put his entire household in trouble, meanwhile he was oblivious of the impending doom and was just drinking his life away. Imagine the state David and his men would have met Nabal. He would have been so drunk without any control to mitigate the impact of his actions. Thankfully Abigail was up for the task.

Throughout the story of Abigail, she demonstrated patience towards Nabal. First, she didn’t start by nagging and accusing Nabal for refusing to assist David and his men. Abigail was patient enough to take care of the situation. When she returned to meet her very drunk husband, she was patient enough to let matters lie until he became sober. What an attitude! Most women in the position of Abigail would have started the drama right after the servants mentioned the incident. Others would have caused a scene at the sheep shearing knowing that Nabal was partying while his attitudes had almost caused an extermination. Abigail knew the nature of her husband, she patiently waited until daybreak. “Then in the morning, when Nabal was sober, his wife told him all these things, and his heart failed him and he became like a stone” (1 Samuel 25:37). In his sober state, Nabal was convicted of his action. He knew that if Abigail had not intervened, he would have been a dead man. The message Bible renders 1 Samuel 25:37-38 this way: “But in the morning, after Nabal had sobered up, she told him the whole story. Right then and there he had a heart attack and fell into a coma. About ten days later God finished him off and he died” (1 Samuel 25:36‭-‬38 MSG). When Nabal understood the full weight of his actions, his heart and body failed him. He might have been a real fool to have missed the bigger picture of his actions. 

Nabal’s folly led him to an early grave leaving behind a beautiful and intelligent widow. Abigail’s marriage with Nabal ended on a very sad note. Her own husband orchestrated his own downfall. What would become of Abigail? What if her husband had made many other enemies beside David? Abigail might have had to develop enough patience to live with Nabal. Her marriage was desirable when it came to money and provision but in attitude, Abigail had to accommodate the messes of Nabal. 

Indeed, love is patient and kind. Patience is a virtue. If we lose patience, we ultimately lose ourselves and the battle of controlling our anger. If we don’t learn to be patient, we would ultimately become a patient to our impatience and anger. Anger lies in the bosom of fools (Ecclesiastes 7:9). The remedy for Nabal’s trouble was Abigail’s patience. 

Abigail’s quick response to a harsh reply

Our attitude towards people can make or unmake us. How we react to situations generally arises from our character and demeanor. In the previous post on Abigail, we saw how Nabal, Abigail’s husband, reacted to the request from David. Nabal’s harsh response was like brewing a wine in a small pot. Nabal didn’t consider the magnitude of his wicked reply. He continued his sheep shearing without the slightest remorse. Afterall, He owned the sheep, not David. How could Nabal not have anticipated that David and his men would come after him? Was Nabal really unaware of the exploits of David? Even the servants of Nabal were scared because of what Nabal did. They knew the gravity of his wickedness and the potential effect it would have on them. One of the servants told Abigail, Nabal’s wife, “David sent messengers from the wilderness to give our master his greetings, but he hurled insults at them. Yet these men were very good to us. They did not mistreat us, and the whole time we were out in the fields near them nothing was missing. Night and day they were a wall around us the whole time we were herding our sheep near them. Now think it over and see what you can do, because disaster is hanging over our master and his whole household. He is such a wicked man that no one can talk to him.” (1 Samuel 25:14‭-‬17).

Abigail acted quickly. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys. (1 Samuel 25:18)

Abigail’s quick response to this response is what made all the difference. Instead of rushing to Nabal and confronting him of his wickedness and the potential result of his action, Abigail rather took the matter in her own hands. She considered how quickly David and his men might come after them and how quickly she would be able to mitigate the impact of her husband’s harshness. “Abigail acted quickly. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys. Then she told her servants, “Go on ahead; I’ll follow you.” But she did not tell her husband Nabal.” (1 Samuel 25:18‭-‬19). Abigail’s response is worth emulating. First, she understood that the gravity of Nabal’s error wouldn’t be fixed with an immediate confrontation. Second,she knew that to appease David and his men, she should provide something relevant to the first request from David. Abigail packaged enough food. Thirdly, Abigail knew that the earlier she reached David the better and so sent her servants ahead. Lastly, Abigail did not inform Nabal that she was on her way to meet David to fix Nabal’s wickedness. We know that Nabal would have probably refused that.

No wonder Abigail is a depiction of beauty with brains. She might have married a fool but she was wise. She was not just beautiful in physical appearance, but she had a beautiful heart. Abigail was a quick thinker, she was tact and fast. She knew that reacting to a foolish reply with a harsh reply would just escalate the situation but not resolve it. “As she came riding her donkey into a mountain ravine, there were David and his men descending toward her, and she met them. David had just said, “It’s been useless—all my watching over this fellow’s property in the wilderness so that nothing of his was missing. He has paid me back evil for good. May God deal with David, be it ever so severely, if by morning I leave alive one male of all who belong to him!” (1 Samuel 25:20‭-‬22). David was on his way to destroy Nabal and his entire household. 

Abigail’s extemporaneous speech to David (1 Samuel 25:23‭-‬31c) calmed the raging waters: “When Abigail saw David, she quickly got off her donkey and bowed down before David with her face to the ground. She fell at his feet and said: “Pardon your servant, my Lord, and let me speak to you; hear what your servant has to say. Please pay no attention, my Lord, to that wicked man Nabal. He is just like his name—his name means Fool, and folly goes with him. And as for me, your servant, I did not see the men my Lord sent. And now, my Lord, as surely as the Lord your God lives and as you live, since the Lord has kept you from bloodshed and from avenging yourself with your own hands, may your enemies and all who are intent on harming my Lord be like Nabal. And let this gift, which your servant has brought to my Lord, be given to the men who follow you. “Please forgive your servant’s presumption. The Lord your God will certainly make a lasting dynasty for my Lord, because you fight the Lord’s battles, and no wrongdoing will be found in you as long as you live. Even though someone is pursuing you to take your life, the life of my Lord will be bound securely in the bundle of the living by the Lord your God, but the lives of your enemies he will hurl away as from the pocket of a sling. When the Lord has fulfilled for my Lord every good thing he promised concerning him and has appointed him ruler over Israel, my Lord will not have on his conscience the staggering burden of needless bloodshed or of having avenged himself. And when the Lord your God has brought my Lord success, remember your servant.”

Abigail did not just apologize to David, she also reminded David of the Lord’s promises towards him to make David the king of Israel. Abigail reminded David that the Lord will hurl away all the enemies of David and therefore there was no need for David to avenge himself. Further, Abigail asks David to remember her when he becomes successful. Abigail would have been a perfect deal maker. She knew the right buttons to touch to mellow the giant slayer mellow. She did not just fix the situation, she also requested for a possible future remembrance. No wonder, David knew exactly what to do when the right time came. 

May we have the attitude of Abigail. May our beauty be complemented with good character and knowledge. The attitude of Abigail does not just soothe an angry giant slayer, it takes the wife of a fool into the palace of a king. Be mindful, be tactful, be loving, be a peacemaker, be willing to be low and be ready to meet the high and mighty. Be the soothing balm of a giant slayer and you shall be celebrated in high places.

Abigail: Beauty and the beast

A few years ago, when I was getting ready for marriage, one of the things I prayerfully considered was a wise husband. For me, spirituality without wisdom was tantamount to nothing. If we fail to consider the nature and character of our partners before we marry, a beautiful woman would be in a holy wedlock with a sentimental fool. So many beautiful and God-fearing people have married spouses who turned out to be something else. Some beautiful women have married beasts who turned the women into punching bags. Some hard working men have married extremely lazy and contemptuous women. Whereas going into such marriages seems easier, coming out is the most difficult experience. As our faith does not support divorce, make sure you choose your partner with all wisdom and understanding.  Love has eyes, it is never blind.

The man’s name was Nabal and his wife’s name was Abigail; she was a woman of good understanding, and beautiful. But the man was rough and evil in his doings; he was a Calebite. (1 Samuel 25:3 AMPC)

As we continue our series on women in the Bible, let’s stop at Carmel. We would visit the house of Nabal and Abigail. Our focus would be on Abigail, the wife of Nabal. Their story also intertwines with the story of David. This is how the Bible introduced Nabal and Abigail: “There was a certain man in Maon who carried on his business in the region of Carmel. He was very prosperous—three thousand sheep and a thousand goats, and it was sheep-shearing time in Carmel. The man’s name was Nabal (Fool), a Calebite, and his wife’s name was Abigail. The woman was intelligent and good-looking, the man brutish and mean.” (1 Samuel 25:2‭-‬3 MSG). Before the reader is exposed to what really happened, the stage was set. Abigail was intelligent and beautiful but Nabal was brute and mean. In other words, Abigail and Nabal were like beauty and the beast. How did two different people manage to live under the same roof? Now, see what happened: 

“While David was in the wilderness, he heard that Nabal was shearing sheep. So he sent ten young men and said to them, “Go up to Nabal at Carmel and greet him in my name. Say to him: ‘Long life to you! Good health to you and your household! And good health to all that is yours! “ ‘Now I hear that it is sheep-shearing time. When your shepherds were with us, we did not mistreat them, and the whole time they were at Carmel nothing of theirs was missing. Ask your own servants and they will tell you. Therefore be favorable toward my men, since we come at a festive time. Please give your servants and your son David whatever you can find for them.’ ” (1 Samuel 25:4‭-‬8). Nabal’s reply was, “Who is this David? Who is this son of Jesse? Many servants are breaking away from their masters these days. Why should I take my bread and water, and the meat I have slaughtered for my shearers, and give it to men coming from who knows where?” (1 Samuel 25:10‭-‬11). Was this reply intentional? Didn’t Nabal know who David was? Was Nabal just being harsh and mean? Whatever Nabal’s intention was, it really triggered David to retaliate. 

In case Nabal just wanted to be mean to David, he should have known that his response could potentially cause David the giant slayer to attack him and his household. Nabal’s harsh reply put all he had in potential threat. What was he thinking? A giant slayer with over 600 men who had helped Nabal’s shepherds made a request, and the response even surprised Nabal’s own shepherds. No wonder Proverbs admonishes us to get wisdom: “Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or turn away from them. Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Cherish her, and she will exalt you; embrace her, and she will honor you. She will give you a garland to grace your head and present you with a glorious crown.” (Proverbs 4:5‭-‬9)

Abigail might have had to daily deal with the excesses of Nabal. If she failed to correct his errors, even her own life was in danger. Imagine if Nabal had married a woman who was not as wise as Abigail. The result would have been worse. We shall continue to look at Abigail’s reaction to this situation in our next post.

Many marriages have spouses with attitudes such as Nabal. In such unions, the other spouses would have to daily repair and restore relationships and friendships, build trust and apologize to as many people who experience the brutality of their spouses. If you are married to anyone who has the character of Nabal, I pray for God’s wisdom to navigate through. If you are yet to marry, make sure not to overlook any red flags along the way. If beauty marries the beast in real life (not in Disney movies), beauty either changes to a beast or gets consumed by the beast. Before you tie the knot, look around, look ahead, and look up…don’t miss any signal. In real life, the beast doesn’t turn into a prince charming by the deactivating tears of a beautiful princess. For a real life beauty to tame a beast, it takes lots of work, prayers, fasting and potential bruises from the beast. Your body might be bruised and your emotions might be hurt as well.