Tamar: Raped and Hated

Imagine if there was a television station in 1000 BCE about the time of the reign of king David. With all the hullabaloo of the royal house, one news that might potentially cause the first son of the king to lose all access to the throne would be this: “King David’s palace was alerted today of an incident in Amnon’s quarters. Amnon, the son of Ahinoam and the first son of the king cunningly raped Tamar the daughter of the king through his wife Maakah. Tamar is the beautiful sister of the handsome Absalom.” Although there were no televisions in 1000 BCE and maybe an unfortunate incident such as the rape of the king’s daughter might not be announced publicly, it would no doubt affect Amnon’s reputation and Tamar’s self esteem. Amnon’s obsession with his own sister was no good. Even the advisor of Amnon saw that Amnon was looking haggard. Amnon confessed to his shrewd advisor  known as Jonadab that he was in love with Tamar. 

Upon Jonadab’s counsel, Amnon lied to David and had Tamar go to his house and make some bread for him. Tamar did not refuse to help a sick brother. She went and baked the bread as was expected. Then she took the pan and served him the bread, but he refused to eat and rather said  “Send everyone out of here” and so everyone left him (2 Samuel 13:9). Amnon said to Tamar, “Bring the food here into my bedroom so I may eat from your hand.” And Tamar took the bread she had prepared and brought it to her brother Amnon in his bedroom (2 Samuel 13:10). Tamar had no slight idea that her brother was up to no good. She innocently followed the instructions of her elder brother without no malice intent. However, when she took the bread to him to eat, he grabbed her and said, “Come to bed with me, my sister” (2 Samuel 13:11). Tamar gave Amnon enough reasons to persuade Amnon from raping her. She said: “No, my brother! Don’t force me! Such a thing should not be done in Israel! Don’t do this wicked thing. What about me? Where could I get rid of my disgrace? And what about you? You would be like one of the wicked fools in Israel. Please speak to the king; he will not keep me from being married to you.” (2 Samuel 13:12‭-‬13). 

But he refused to listen to her, and since he was stronger than she, he raped her. (2 Samuel 13:14)

Amnon was bent on evil and without remorse, he went ahead with his evil plans. He refused to listen to the words of counsel from Tamar and since he was stronger than His sister, he raped her (2 Samuel 13:14). What was Tamar’s crime to deserve this shameful treatment? As if that was not enough, Amnon drove her out of his house. After raping her, the infatuation was over. Amnon’s obsession was never out of love. He was just looking for an opportunity to sleep with his sister. The aftermath of the rape was this: Amnon hated Tamar with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her. Amnon said to her, “Get up and get out!” (2 Samuel 13:15). Which kind of wickedness is this? Even when Tamar begged him not to throw her out, Amnon refused to listen. Amnon called his personal servant and said, “Get this woman out of my sight and bolt the door after her” (2 Samuel 13:17). Like how? None of this makes sense. Amnon was a wicked and heartless young man. Imagine him as a king of Israel. Far from it! His actions did not just rid him of his position as the first born, it also made him a “wicked fool” just as Tamar had cautioned. Tamar was disgraced, raped and hated by her own brother. As the cultural sign, “Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the ornate robe she was wearing” and “she put her hands on her head and went away, weeping aloud as she went” (2 Samuel 13:19).

In case you cannot stand the wickedness of Amnon, know that there are hundreds, thousands and even ten thousands of Amnons in the 21st century. These are men who are bent on evil. Some of these Amnons have raped their own wives, raped their children, raped their sisters, raped their friends, raped strangers, raped students etc. Fortunately, some of these Amnons have been arrested and charged for their crimes and yet others are walking about causing more pain and havoc. Amnon’s advisor,  Jonadab is the kind of friend you might want to avoid. The counsel of Jonadab was evil and yet, only Amnon would suffer the consequences of listening to Jonadab. 

Dear sisters, if you have an Amnon in your life that makes life uncomfortable for you, reach out to the appropriate authorities for help. 
Dear brothers, be a keeper of the women around you. Don’t let their kindness become a stepping stone to your evil intent. God will surely punish every evil. 
Dear lawmaker, don’t ignore the pleas of Tamars and don’t free the Amnons. 

The unnamed woman who destroyed Abimelek: Silent warriors

One of the people who set their minds to do evil and brutally accomplished it in the Bible is Abimelek. He was cruel, heartless, evil, brute, wicked and lacked empathy and common instincts. The story of Abimelek is recorded in Judges 9. He was the son of Gideon, a judge who was used by God to save the people of Israel at some point. After his successful campaign over the Midianites, the Israelites wanted to make Gideon a king but he refused: “The Israelites said to Gideon, “Rule over us—you, your son and your grandson—because you have saved us from the hand of Midian.” But Gideon told them, “I will not rule over you, nor will my son rule over you. The Lord will rule over you.” (Judges 8:22‭-‬23). Gideon made a golden ephod which he placed in Ophrah, his town and all Israel prostituted themselves by worshiping it there, and it became a snare to Gideon and his family” (Judges 8:27). Gideon had seventy sons of his own, from his many wives and his concubine, who lived in Shechem, also bore him a son, whom he named Abimelek meaning “my father is king.” Abimelek conspired with his relatives in Shechem and killed sixty-nine of his brothers. Only Jotham, the youngest, escaped. As if this was not enough, Abimelek and the people of Shechem became enemies after three years (instigated by God because of their evil). With cruelty, wickedness and evil Abimelek dealt with the Shechemites until one woman silenced him.

Abimelek went to the tower and attacked it. But as he approached the entrance to the tower to set it on fire, a woman dropped an upper millstone on his head and cracked his skull. (Judges 9:52‭-‬53)

The poignant smell of Abimelek’s evil against his own brothers rose to God and Heaven responded. The Schechemites were wrong to sponsor the murder of the sons of Gideon. We could blame Gideon for raising an idol and naming his son Abimelek (my father is king) but it does not take the fact that Gideon obeyed God and through him, the Midianite were defeated. Abimelek was running wild with no one to tame him. He destroyed cities, burnt fields, destroyed homes and killed people without remorse. He was power drunk, and his aim was to clear his path of any seemingly enemy no matter what it takes. There are miniature Abimeleks in the world now. They are brute, evil and without any sense of love. Their vision is to steal, kill and destroy just like their master the devil (John 10:10). Their swords are sharp and their arrows are full of poisonous snares. May God deliver us from such people. Abimelek was unstoppable and whole cities fled from his presence. He cared less for anyone other than himself. In one of his campaigns, to annihilate the people of Thebez by setting them on fire inside their city tower, another warrior intercepted him. He didn’t know what was in store for him. “Abimelek went to the tower and attacked it. But as he approached the entrance to the tower to set it on fire, a woman dropped an upper millstone on his head and cracked his skull.” (Judges 9:52‭-‬53)

The wicked Abimelek was badly wounded by an unnamed woman, a warrior with no history,  a silent but determined warrior. She did not miss the target. In his frustration, Abimelek hurriedly called to his armor-bearer, “Draw your sword and kill me, so that they can’t say, ‘A woman killed him.’ ” So his servant ran him through, and he died. When the Israelites saw that Abimelek was dead, they went home.” (Judges 9:54‭-‬55). The bloody campaigns of Abimelek was stopped by a woman. The Bible does not even give the name of this woman. She was obviously harmless and afraid for her life while she hid in the tower. But, at a moment, she realized that she could either perish with the rest of the city or she could kill Abimelek and rescue the city. She chose the latter and she saved her city. She was probably celebrated in the city and her legacy have been documented as a reminder of how one woman stopped a ravaging serial killer. Abimelek’s tantrums were calmed and peace was restored once again. The warrior had just a millstone.

The unnamed woman who ended the evil reign of Abimelek, son of Gideon reminds us that no one is too insignificant for battle. Moses had an ordinary staff, and God used it for extraordinary purposes. The unnamed woman had a millstone and it cracked the skull of the villain. You have the Godhead and you still see yourself as the least? Be empowered, be ready, hold your sword, and as you fearlessly prepare with the armor of God (Ephesians 6:11), strategically position yourself to drop some spiritual ballistic missiles on your enemies. We are too equipped to lose this battle. We are made for more!