Some of the weird names I heard as a child were names of people who were born after their parents had suffered a great deal of loss in relation to childbirth. One might think that after losing a couple of babies, the one that survived would be named to signify the victory the parents have had over their painful experiences. However, according to the culture of the society I grew up in, the best way to let these children remain was to give them unpleasant names to ensure their survival. I heard names translated as “refuse dump”, “vulture”, “the land is finished”, “struggles” among many others. In most cases, as these name bearers grew, they tended to shun their names and some even refused to respond to it, only making use of their English or Christian names. As ridiculous as this sounds, this practice is not new to humanity. Thousands of years ago, some women also named their children according to their pain. Let’s look at some examples from the Bible:
Rachel on her death bed named her son “Ben-Oni” meaning “son of my trouble” but Jacob changed it to Benjamin, “son of my right hand”.
Genesis 35:18: As she breathed her last—for she was dying—she named her son Ben-Oni. But his father named him Benjamin.
The wife of Phinehas named her son “Ichabod” which means “no glory”.
1 Samuel 4:21-22: She named the boy Ichabod, saying, “The Glory has departed from Israel”—because of the capture of the ark of God and the deaths of her father-in-law and her husband. She said, “The Glory has departed from Israel, for the ark of God has been captured.”
Jabez’ name means “pain” and it was given by his mother because she gave birth to him in pain.
1 Chronicles 4:9: Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying, “I gave birth to him in pain.”
Jabez was more honourable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying, “I gave birth to him in pain.” (1 Chronicles 4:9)
For Benjamin, his father was quick to change his name but for Ichabod and Jabez, their painful experiences became part of their existence. How do we live beyond the pain of our past? Should the meaning of your name (if bad) define the quality of your existence? Let’s consider Jabez and how he refined his life beyond his mother’s painful experience.
1 Chronicles 4:10 states this: Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, “Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.” And God granted his request.
Pray to God: Jabez being aware of the spiritual implications of his name came to understand that only God can change his destiny from that of pain to gain. Jabez’ cried to God, not to his mother who gave him the name. He knew that any spiritual connection to the name can be broken through the power of God. Whenever our painful past or a traumatic experience is influencing and affecting the quality of our lives, we should cry unto God through prayer. He made us and He has times and seasons in His hands. He can make our pain stepping stones for greatness.
Be specific in your prayers: Most times, when we are in pain, we turn to pray in circles just crying and complaining without even mentioning what we want God to do for us. Jabez knew what he wanted. As the chronicle of Israel was being given, the author gave a brief pause and brought in the powerful prayer of Jabez. This was his prayer: “Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.” Jabez knew that pain can bring a ripple effect. His prayer was for God to bless him and enlarge his territory. He knew pain can cause stagnation. He prayed for God’s protection and freedom from pain. He didn’t ask for fire to fall on his mother and his mockers. He didn’t ask for the death of his enemies. He prayed for himself. Specificity in prayer is necessary because when we ask to satisfy our whims and caprice, most times, we don’t get results. James 4:3 mentions this: “When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.”
Enlargement is from God: Jabez understood that only God can cause his life to move beyond his current state. Every pain defining territory is subjected to God and so when Jabez prayed for God to enlarge his territory, he plea was to move beyond his pain defined territory to a God-defined territory. When we are stagnated because of a painful past experience, moving beyond that to possess bigger blessings is not automatic. Like Jabez, we need to identify with the pain-breaker to also enlarge our territories.
Freedom from pain: When we go through pains, the only thing that can make us free is for the yoke of the pain to be broken. Unlike Ben-Oni that was changed to Benjamin, Jabez didn’t change his name. However, a request from Jabez was this: “keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain”. Freedom from pain can be both physical and spiritual. For people going through physical pain, freedom is to be rescued from their oppressors. For Jabez, his freedom from pain was the breaking and the demolishing of the yoke of pain that held him down for years. Pain can make you forget God and even leave church. Job’s wife was in so much pain that her only request was for her husband to curse God and die. Therefore, whenever we go through any sort of pain, it is important to pray for God to grant us the freedom from both the physical and spiritual implications of the pain.
The last part of 1 Chronicles 4:10 makes this profound statement: “And God granted his request.” Jabez, the man who was named Pain because of a mother’s painful experience, had a total turnaround. God answered Jabez prayer. The story changed to this:
“And the Lord blessed Jabez and enlarged his territory. The hand of the Lord was with Jabez, and kept him from harm so that he was free from pain.” The prayer of Jabez is still relevant today. Whatever you might be experiencing, go before God like Jabez and pray for a life-changing, transformational prayer. If you don’t give up, this will be your story: “And God granted [your name] request.”