Train up the child

While growing up, there were times I felt my parents were too strict. Why were we not given freedom like other children? Why should we always obey our parents when other children disobey and are not disciplined? I must confess, although the Sunday school teachers reminded us to obey our parents because that pleased the Lord, I appreciate my parents parenting skills better now that I am an adult. I thank God I was trained, disciplined, corrected and directed everyday. As a parent now, I feel the same urge to train my children on the right path so that they can grow up as God-fearing and responsible adults. If we fail to instill godly principles, we give room for the devil to operate in the lives of our children. 

Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6 NKJV)

The Bible is very open on training up and bringing up children in the fear of the Lord. The world may present children’s right as a better alternative but the advocacy for children’s right has led many destitute. The rise in the use of harmful drugs, the exposure to weapons, and the public display of sex has been a foundational problem. We are quick to blame authorities for our parental failures but we find it difficult to accept that no teacher, trainer, counselor, nanny etc. can train up our children better than us parents. To build and sustain godly principles in our homes, we should be very intentional in training up our children. Proverbs 22:6 states that: “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it” (NKJV). I remember vividly every instruction I received from my parents. They may not have attained celebrity status or even higher education but their counsel is golden.

When we understand that we are responsible for the godly training and upbringing of our children, we should focus our attention on seeking knowledge that will aid us in training them. The challenges of drug abuse, sex and relationships have become stumbling blocks for both Christian and non-Christian parents. Many parents choose to shy away from engaging in meaningful conversations about these topics. It was strange in our days to hear children talk about relationships and sex. Now, even the kindergarten child is aware of sex and relationships. They have boyfriends,  girlfriends, crushes, have exes etc. This is the reality now. The media has exposed children to so many vices that we as parents need to talk to them about it before they get misinformed by others. Our homes will only be better if we spend time training our children. It may seem like an impossible task but with dedication, persistence, intentionality, perseverance and God’s grace, we will raise up godly and responsible adults.

Finally, let’s continue to pray for the children. As we teach and train them, let us also pray for God’s guidance and protection. May God help us even as we commit to intentional parenting. 

The Shema: Let them hear the word of God

Religious creeds and quotes have been used for millennia. For some people, these creeds helped them to understand basic Biblical truths and principles. For example,  the Apostles’ creed gives an understanding of the things the church believes. Recitals are quite important for memorization and when we learn new Bible verses, we are encouraged to memorize them. The ancient Jewish culture relied extensively on recitals and memorization. People memorized books of the Bible and could effortlessly quote books without struggle. Definitely this is relevant because the Bible was not as common as we have now. But, in our day, not many believers have cultivated the culture of memorizing scriptures. We rely so much on print and electronic media  more than memorization. 

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. (Deuteronomy 6:4‭-‬5)

Among the Jews, the Shema is an important creed that must be quoted in the morning and the evening.  The Shema is taken from Deuteronomy 6:4-5: Hear, O Israel: “The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.” The Shema is still an important aspect of the Jewish culture and religion. Why is it important to use Biblical quotes? In raising a godly home, it is necessary for the family to engage everyone with scriptures. None should be left out. Just like the way the Shema calls us to “Listen, Hear”, we should daily invite our household to hear scriptures. We should be intentional about investing into the family, the word of God and godly principles. These should reflect our way of life. 

Moses told the Israelites in Deuteronomy 6:6-9, “These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” 

The way to impress God’s commandments on our hearts is to live with it. Moses commands the Israelites to impress the commandments onto their children. No one is too young to be left out. We are called to talk about God’s commands when we sit at home, when we are walking, when we lie down and when we get up… literally all the time. The commands are to be tied on the hand, on the foreheads, written on the door frames and the gates. How can you ever forget when you are all surrounded by God’s command. The Shema is a call to believers to hold forth God’s word in every facet of their lives. It is a call unto families to make the word of God accessible in their homes and to their children. The Shema reminds us of the unity of the Godhead: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. The Shema reminds us to to love the Lord with all our being: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.

May God help us even as we raise godly homes and families. 

Unless the Lord builds the house

“The blessing of the Lord brings wealth, without painful toil for it” (Proverbs 10:22) has been a fundamental scripture to many believers. It is indeed true that true wealth comes from the Lord and whatever we commit in His hands he sustains it. In whatever we do, it is important to understand that without the Lord, we may never bring it to a perfect state. Certainly many unbelievers have big projects that seem to thrive and are successful. But, true success is a product of the Lord’s blessing. This implies that there are many multinational companies that can be better than they are now if the Lord has been involved. The Lord is certainly the builder of everything! Humanity is limited in our capacity to make things, to build homes, to have good cities, better economic conditions etc. The Lord is limitless!

Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain. (Psalms 127:1)

We saw that women have specific features that make them better stewards for home building and definitely men have good qualities for keeping the home as well. But, the Lord is the keeper of everything. He gives grace to those who build the home, the city, the church, a business etc. The house in this context refers to both physical structures (house, temple, any structure) or the spiritual structures (family, kingdom business etc.). The house also refers to the endeavours of our hands. Psalm 127:1 states: “Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain.” If God is not involved, humanity has to put in laborious effort but this is never into perfection. 

Our understanding that the blessing of the Lord must be on everything we do, influences our lives. We know that without the blessings of God, our toils are in vain and even the guard stands in vain! If we do not commit everything into God’s hands and allow Him to take charge, our endeavours will not have divine blessings. We need God’s grace, blessing, provision, sustenance, favour, insight in everything we do. The family,  the city, the church is better with God. In fact, our best plans may not be the will of God and we should seek divine guidance for everything. Our dependency for growth and success should be on God! If He is not involved, “In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat— for he grants sleep to those he loves” (Psalms 127:2). 

Our human enterprises are successful by divine blessings. 

The wise woman builds her house

Have you seen a family breakdown caused by the fact that both the husband and wife were busily minding their businesses and neither of them cared for the well-being of the home? Career progress, success routes, money, fame, maintaining a very good public image and a consciousness to be better than your partner can impede the family system. It is good to have it all, but our quest to be the best among the rest should not sacrifice the home. The reason divorce tends to be more among working-class couples is the fact that commitment to the home is lesser than commitment to career. Going for soccer practice with children seems less important as compared to attending a business meeting. Until couples make their home a priority, the statistics on divorce are likely to keep rising. 

The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. (Proverbs 14:1)

The woman is predisposed to better home management based on the things we value. Certainly, every good and godly man is a man builder as well. Proverbs 14:1 highlights the fact that through careful handling, the wise woman is able to build her house. This literally means the woman improves and makes the family better. The due diligence taken to ensure that the home is the best place for everyone is compared to “building” a structure. Every building requires planning, a good foundation and strong pillars to make it stand. The average woman is good at multitasking: can handle different activities at the same time without losing sight of the other etc. This potential makes the woman more comfortable to combine a full-time job with full-time home management. 

According to the Keil and Delitzsch Biblical Commentary on Proverbs 14:1, “the oneness of the house is more dependent on the mother than on the father. A wise mother can, if her husband be dead or neglectful of his duty, always keep the house together.” The wise woman ensures that her household is kept together and takes due diligence to ensure a smooth run of the home. On the other hand, an inconsiderate woman, referred to as the “foolish one” in Proverbs 14:1 tears her own house down by her hands. Through idleness, laziness, unnecessary friendships and baseless conversations, lavish lifestyle without contributing economically to it, unnecessary pressure to be like others, a woman is more likely to destroy her home rather than build it. 

As we saw in our previous blog, God is the builder of everything: For every house is built by someone, but God is the builder of everything” (Hebrews 3:4). He has placed us as stewards to manage the families and the homes we have. We all have our responsibilities to keep to ensure that we raise godly offspring for the Lord. Be intentional about investing in physical things and spiritual things (family devotions, prayers, Bible studies etc.) to raise a God-fearing home that is built on godly principles.